mermaid musings

cancer full moon at zero degrees

Saturday, December 22 @ 12:48PM EST

a butterfly emerges from the cocoon. it took longer than the caterpillar had imagined. it took more strength, commitment, & bravery than the caterpillar had even known it possessed. the complete mush it had become was terrifying & reformation seemed like a fantasy. but here you are, free from the death & fresh in the rebirth. yes, you can fly now. surprisingly though, you’re exhausted. in your excitement, you forgot that of course you must need a moment of rest after all that enormous effort it took to become what you are now. so the butterfly takes many long, slow moments to sit in the sun. to let their tender wings dry & strengthen. to reorient to what it means to be a butterfly now. there’s no urgency in these moments, no fear that somehow they will become a caterpillar again if they don’t FLY RIGHT NOW. because they know that too fast too soon means they will will tear. every rise & fall of their wings is an act of confidence, trusting that when its ready is when its time. stillness is the practice, freedom is the reward.

for a full Moon analysis & horoscope for your sign, join the COMMUNE.

oxo
saltwater & stars

dark moon recommendation

active until the new Moon in sagittarius December 7 @2:20AM EST

from UNSPLASH

from UNSPLASH


the dark Moon is in scorpio with Mercury, ambassador of the underworld, & Venus the Producer of Pleasure. your most important contribution to relationships & the collective right now (and always) may be your integrity. the more you cultivate intentionality & listen to your intuitive directives, the less you have to do damage control or micro-manage other peoples responses because your impact is messy.

this isn’t about binaries & linearity or perfection-fuck that. the question is: what upward spirals (growth) are you interested in? remember, you don’t have to perform any energy to be present to this. you can be like honey. slow, sweet, & present. growth is tender, feels so vulnerable. you might be tired of hearing that word but it’s time, starling. time to be accountable to where & how you want to grow. because vulnerability without accountability is projection, manipulation, or damage control. and that paradigm is dying—swiftly.

“In order to rise from its own ashes, a Phoenix first must burn.”—Octavia Butler


upward spirals don’t happen in your resistance to transformation. they don’t happen when you dig your roots into “the way things are” or “the way I am”. when unhealed/unconscious shit comes to your attention, it is not a question of “do you want [fill in the blank] badly enough?”, it’s an invitation to honor the opportunities for deliverance. your shame, fear, & pain don’t have to be here to stay. it’s easy to be consumed by the deep betrayals or your self or by other people. you don’t have to stay there, either. say yes yes yes to the antidote, to what you’ve been terrified of: telling the truth, tolerating no shit, & taking up space.

don’t stay in “fuck it, fuck them, fuck you, fuck me” (unless it’s sexual, then please do your thing). admit those feelings of FUCK & know that it is the moment you can choose to transform. you want the magnificent blessings & abundance the next six months can bring? you wanna ride the sagittarian centaur into your sovereignty? remember that this year cleared a bunch of shit out the way. breathe into that space. then do your conjuring to minister to your wounds-not all of them, just the ones that are in the way. stay on your path of recovery & retrieval. be done with distractions (as many times as you need to decide you’re done) from people who can’t see in the dark or want to stay burning. let yourself dissolve into ashes because you’re devoted to rebirth, dedicated to rising. you don’t need to be ashamed of your eagerness to evolve- it’s your luminosity.

”It’s increasingly difficult for me to vibe with people—even keen, talented people—who are salty about everything all the time. Gotta have some sweetness in this life. I believe in the intelligence of honey.”@theferocity. in reply: "I found that these ppl are often not as “involved” in the business of curing these things which make them salty as they claim. The real warriors are actually dripping in honey.”—@HappySingleGal

your horoscopes for the new Moon in sagittarius will be out tonight.

oxo
saltwater & stars

mars in pisces: the medicine of grief

my image of Lamb’s Ear/ Wood Betony chosen for it’s association with Jupiter, traditional ruler of pisces and fire, the element of Mars. used for protection & purification.

my image of Lamb’s Ear/ Wood Betony chosen for it’s association with Jupiter, traditional ruler of pisces and fire, the element of Mars. used for protection & purification.

do you know when you need medicine? do you know how to find medicine when you need it? do you know what it tastes like? Mars is on the hunt for it, somewhere in your chart, somewhere in your life. pisces medicine sometimes shows up as: interconnectivity, vulnerability, transparency, inspiration, & spiritual resourcefulness. the ultimate surrender. this can be terrifying. like floating in an ageless ocean, in overlapping seas, waiting for the next wave. grief happens here, but so does resurrection.

Mars is fire, hot like lava sometimes. Mars is desire, assertion, initiative, & willpower. the forage for autonomy. because Mars is in pisces, these functions happen through sensitivity, intuition, & vision. Mars in pisces is the desire for vulnerability & interconnectivity. unhealthy Mars energy wants to dominate, possess, never be still or wait- counterproductive to what pisces wants, counterproductive to interconnectivity. this keeps us from relationship because if the depth & breadth of your capacity for intimacy is only measured by how much you got your shit together or any kind of invincibility, it’s not real.

this Mars transit is getting the disappointments, illusions, & hierarchies out the way. everything keeping us from autonomy & authentic relationship is dissolving. this process is painful, but necessary if we want to be fresh & free when Mars enters aries (December 31) rather than acting out of anger, resentment, or bitterness from not tending to the here & now.

disappointments, illusions, & hierarchies often (not always, but we’re talking pisces here) happen when we’re rationalizing ourselves out of our intuition when it first whispers & then spiral into a “situation”. sometimes they happen when we are so terrified of transparent vulnerability & support that includes accountability that we put ourselves on a pedestal, thinking the rising waters won’t touch us there. or they happen when we have these beautiful, miraculous, transcendent ideals about people/places/things & we place them on individuals rather than saying them as prayers.

they can happen when we’re not real about what we actually desire, aren’t practicing interconnectivity, & we’re too caught up in bitterness to be able to breathe. so we escape through expectations that inevitably disappoint, illusions created by individualism or ignoring intuition, & pedestals that keep us distant or safe. because sometimes we put people on a pedestal so we don’t have to be brave & take up space. often the hierarchy, self-imposed or imposed by others, is more comfortable than the uncharted territory we have to navigate when we reject it.

Mars in pisces is about making medicine with grief. right now, it can feel like all our sensitivities, the places where we need to surrender, & our desires (or fears) of vulnerable communion are the water in a cauldron placed over the blazing fire of Mars. maybe it burns a little, maybe it’s a little dangerous. but we can cook medicine in that cauldron. we can dissolve the bullshit of the past away in that cauldron. we can grieve even while giving birth to the future around this cauldron.

Mars in pisces is a reminder that the undercurrents are as real as what’s tangible & factual. we can’t make medicine if we’re running away, trying to escape how translucent our pain is. we can’t make medicine if we’re skipping from pain to power without grieving. we can’t make medicine in isolation. we can’t make medicine in competition or comparison. don’t come to the cauldron with projections, avoidance, or performative vulnerability. if you are bitter, your medicine will taste bitter too. if you are hiding pain or distancing yourself from it, your medicine will treat symptoms rather than restore roots.


how to make it through?
assert your sensitivity; rather than apologizing for it, be response-able with it. be transparent- like actually tell the whole “I feel/I did/I want” truth. choose truthful vulnerability over the performative or curated kind. it is inspirational, especially right now. take initiative with compassion, for yourself & others. be decisive about your edges, containers, & limits. honor your dreams, moods, & emotions. access the undercurrents of your desire through inspiration, intuition, & vision. be in relationship, not transactions & exchanges. and ultimately, be devoted to your spiritual practices, intentions, & sources. let yourself grieve.

make medicine, make magic.
if you need help, I’m here.


oxo
saltwater & stars

dark moon recommendation

it is a dark moon from monday until the new moon in scorpio @11:02AM EST wednesday. details are in the horoscopes.

we often hold these binary ideas of what qualities can & cannot coexist. water dissolves them all. it is gentle AND forceful. it is consistent AND complex. scorpios element is water. it is in-between these binaries that the discomfort of scorpio season lies for many. it is the depth & intensity, like rivers shaping crevices that make mountains. the water that carves landscapes, the water that is most of this earth. the water that is us.

there is strength in your gentleness. there is wisdom in your complexities. there are resources in your crevices. you can carve mountains of hope with your healing, mountains of perspective & power. first, you must be water.

scorpio is water + mars + pluto. this is no lightness of heart. this is no nonchalant fluidity. this is not sagittarius season- yet. scorpio is the work of getting shit right on the inside. scorpio is the medicine of death & rebirth we need when everything hurts, when things go dark, when trust feels impossible. 

your most resilient resources are inside: accumulated from love, ancestors, relationships, and everything you’ve been intuitive enough to gather on your way here. you don’t have to suffer to prove you’re not taking your blessings for granted. you can enjoy them *because* you take nothing for granted. reach in. reach out. 

sometimes we must thoroughly be with what is ending to be present to what is just beginning.    

oxo
saltwater & stars