mars in pisces: the medicine of grief

my image of Lamb’s Ear/ Wood Betony chosen for it’s association with Jupiter, traditional ruler of pisces and fire, the element of Mars. used for protection & purification.

do you know when you need medicine? do you know how to find medicine when you need it? do you know what it tastes like? Mars is on the hunt for it, somewhere in your chart, somewhere in your life. pisces medicine sometimes shows up as: interconnectivity, vulnerability, transparency, inspiration, & spiritual resourcefulness. the ultimate surrender. this can be terrifying. like floating in an ageless ocean, in overlapping seas, waiting for the next wave. grief happens here, but so does resurrection.

Mars is fire, hot like lava sometimes. Mars is desire, assertion, initiative, & willpower. the forage for autonomy. because Mars is in pisces, these functions happen through sensitivity, intuition, & vision. Mars in pisces is the desire for vulnerability & interconnectivity. unhealthy Mars energy wants to dominate, possess, never be still or wait- counterproductive to what pisces wants, counterproductive to interconnectivity. this keeps us from relationship because if the depth & breadth of your capacity for intimacy is only measured by how much you got your shit together or any kind of invincibility, it’s not real.

this Mars transit is getting the disappointments, illusions, & hierarchies out the way. everything keeping us from autonomy & authentic relationship is dissolving. this process is painful, but necessary if we want to be fresh & free when Mars enters aries (December 31) rather than acting out of anger, resentment, or bitterness from not tending to the here & now.

disappointments, illusions, & hierarchies often (not always, but we’re talking pisces here) happen when we’re rationalizing ourselves out of our intuition when it first whispers & then spiral into a “situation”. sometimes they happen when we are so terrified of transparent vulnerability & support that includes accountability that we put ourselves on a pedestal, thinking the rising waters won’t touch us there. or they happen when we have these beautiful, miraculous, transcendent ideals about people/places/things & we place them on individuals rather than saying them as prayers.

they can happen when we’re not real about what we actually desire, aren’t practicing interconnectivity, & we’re too caught up in bitterness to be able to breathe. so we escape through expectations that inevitably disappoint, illusions created by individualism or ignoring intuition, & pedestals that keep us distant or safe. because sometimes we put people on a pedestal so we don’t have to be brave & take up space. often the hierarchy, self-imposed or imposed by others, is more comfortable than the uncharted territory we have to navigate when we reject it.

Mars in pisces is about making medicine with grief. right now, it can feel like all our sensitivities, the places where we need to surrender, & our desires (or fears) of vulnerable communion are the water in a cauldron placed over the blazing fire of Mars. maybe it burns a little, maybe it’s a little dangerous. but we can cook medicine in that cauldron. we can dissolve the bullshit of the past away in that cauldron. we can grieve even while giving birth to the future around this cauldron.

Mars in pisces is a reminder that the undercurrents are as real as what’s tangible & factual. we can’t make medicine if we’re running away, trying to escape how translucent our pain is. we can’t make medicine if we’re skipping from pain to power without grieving. we can’t make medicine in isolation. we can’t make medicine in competition or comparison. don’t come to the cauldron with projections, avoidance, or performative vulnerability. if you are bitter, your medicine will taste bitter too. if you are hiding pain or distancing yourself from it, your medicine will treat symptoms rather than restore roots.


how to make it through?
assert your sensitivity; rather than apologizing for it, be response-able with it. be transparent- like actually tell the whole “I feel/I did/I want” truth. choose truthful vulnerability over the performative or curated kind. it is inspirational, especially right now. take initiative with compassion, for yourself & others. be decisive about your edges, containers, & limits. honor your dreams, moods, & emotions. access the undercurrents of your desire through inspiration, intuition, & vision. be in relationship, not transactions & exchanges. and ultimately, be devoted to your spiritual practices, intentions, & sources. let yourself grieve.

make medicine, make magic.
if you need help, I’m here.


oxo
saltwater & stars

mercury retro thrival tips: sagittarius style

image from UNSPLASH

mercury retrograde:november 16-december 6
shadow zone (the warm up & cool down): october 28-december 24

mercury is retrograde for the last time in 2018 in sagittarius, where jupiter has just entered and the sun will be soon. there are a lot of amazing guides out there for surviving mercury retrograde. yes, back up your technologies & plans- it’s always a good reminder of being in the practice of that. yes, communication can get tricky & friction in the details is real. for some, it’s a prolific time (I have theories about this being especially true for those born with mercury retro). everyone’s experience of each mercury retro can be different, because the individual natal chart always matters.

mercury retro can feel like it’s happening TO you. many of the functions we take for granted or don’t notice stall or reveal their dysfunctionality. we can choose panic, or we can resolve dilemmas through gratitude for what is working & taking the pressure off of what is not. I’ve observed that what often causes the most mayhem during mercury retro is going against the current of the energy, when we are not listening to intuition or being more cautious & slow as needed. pushing when we need to pause. making moves when we need to be still causes friction- sometimes it’s needed, sometimes it’s not. wisdom is, as they say, knowing the difference.

mercury retro is nothing to fear. fear is not a healthy foundation for any relationship. mercury retro is an invitation to be in deeper relationship with time, words, & communications. THE MIND. rather than figuring out how to survive a seemingly constant onslaught of mishaps, examine where you can make different decisions or use different strategies. this is particularly true with this round of mercury retro because jupiter just entered sagittarius. the shit that comes up now may give you hints on themes for growth & learning that will surround you in the next year.

here are some tips to take you from survival to thrival, sagittarius style:

assumptions are nonconsensual. sagittarius/jupiter energy is prone to inflation. think of assumptions as an inflation of your intuition. intuition doesn’t give you permission to not ask for clarity or consent. ask questions & ask them sincerely before you respond to what you think is happening or being said. or stay quiet.

be intentional with your attention. be as present as you can in the moments that matter. when someone is speaking to you, listen with your full attention. listen with your heart, listen with your love, listen with curiosity. sagittarius is curious if they don’t stay oversaturated with knowledge by allowing their minds to reset. honor those who are sharing their priceless time with you & stay curious.

consent. lessons I am acutely learning are how to practice consent even in conversations or relationships where there is familiarity. asking if they want feedback before it’s given, asking how they need support, asking for permission to critique. asking questions as if we really don’t know, because sometimes we do & sometimes we don’t. take responsibility for the decisions & offering you make. set boundaries for the ones you’re impacted by or receiving. trick: creating space & comfort for yourself & others to say no when they need to.

time is nonlinear. if something isn’t working out, it doesn’t have to happen now. if something isn’t flowing smoothly, it doesn’t have to be fixed now (or maybe ever). let the excess (a jupiter/sag trait) fall away. or press pause & come back. time is nonlinear: meaning that looking at it as a resource you’re spending & won’t get back is not the only way to look at it. you can restore time, deepen time, stretch time when you do treat it as a priceless resource that you won’t waste on what’s not for you. (listen to more on nonlinear time here).

simplify to amplify. if your schedule is getting hectic, use your agency to make space. cancel what you can. stick to what feels right. schedule big changes, hard conversations, or anything that involves a lot of intracacies or brain power for after the retro if you can. tend to the details to do the dream justice. be patient and gentle with yourself in that limbo between realizations and integration. your power is in the process.

the r’s: review, revise, readjust, refine, reassess, reconsider, reevaluate, reexamine. recall, rethink, remember. these & all their synonyms are what mercury retrograde is for. mercury retrograde in sagittarius will be about applying the r’s to your perspectives, belief systems, honesty, & big thinking. dive deep into any projects, activities, or thought-trains that need this kind of attention. you won’t regret it.

oxo
saltwater & stars

deepen the truth, widen the space

Jupiter in Sagittarius
November 8, 2018- December 2, 2019

Jupiter in scorpio was an age of exposure (November 2017-today). secrets, lies, harm done in the dark, toxicity, abuse, shitty power dynamics. our capacities to heal, to be vulnerable, & to transform were stretched. because what is not real is not true & life cannot thrive in deceit. collectively & personally many of us have learned the importance of boundaries, explored the meaning of healthy power, & how to hold onto our hope even in pain. scorpio is death, but Jupiter is benevolent. if you look back, you may find that when let go of something that was hurting you, something came to love you instead. or what was already for you became clearer… if you can’t see this now, Jupiter in sagittarius will show you.

Jupiter in sagittarius will be an age of amplification. Jupiter holds the power of integrity, potential, what is possible, the bigger picture. EXPANSION. Jupiter is interested in belief systems from which we get our hope, faith, & truth. sagittarius is radical candor- profoundly open. sagittarius makes meaning out of the pain, finds clarity in confusion, explores where wisdom is hidden. the deeper the truth, the wider the space.

Jupiter in sagittarius is an invitation to choose transparency over arrogance, trust over fear, joy over perfection. Jupiter in sagittarius brings abundance. Jupiter in sagittarius brings deliverance. Jupiter in sagittarius brings sovereignty. blessings on blessings on blessings.

because Jupiter is an amplifier of the truth, especially when in sagittarius whom it rules, it will become clear where we are doing too much or not enough. where we are in excess or in waste. the hypocrisies, double standards, or self-righteousness of ourselves & others will show up for scrutiny. often in the exploration of potential, in the expansion towards possibility, or in the gaps of our belief systems we can forget that intent is less important than impact.

Jupiter/sagittarius energy can become so enamored with the beauty of intentions, purpose, & meaning that the practical application (integration) is forgotten. because of the openness, this energy can be all over the place, misdirected, or hollow. direction, commitments, & integrity come into play here. they keep us on path, however nonlinear it is. vision is necessary, it is medicine. alone it does nothing.

in other words, sagittarius needs the grounding of Saturn. thankfully, the god of mastery is strong in capricorn right now & can support us in remembering that the future is in the practical strategies towards our wildest, very possible dreams. what we let go of while Jupiter was in scorpio was space-making for what Jupiter in sagittarius will bring us. because this is very beautiful energy if we elevate it towards clarity, if we are willing to move from intellect/ego to soul. be available to receive, ready to respond, grateful for the growth.

I will absolutely be writing more on this throughout the year & constantly in the horoscopes. if you want to identify what transformed in your life during Jupiter in scorpio & want to know what Jupiter in sagittarius means for you, I’m here.

oxo
saltwater & stars

venus retrograde: the underworld, the phoenix, & love

October 5 @3:05pm est: venus retrograde at 10 degrees of scorpio
October 31: venus retrogrades back into libra
November 16: venus direct at 25 degrees of libra
December 2: venus back in scorpio until January 7, 2019

venus is taking us into the underworld, territory of scorpio ruled by pluto aka hades. more specifically, venus is taking our relationships, resources, & values to the underworld. it’s time to purge, transform, & heal our attachments. it’s time to slow allllllll the way down & get really vulnerable with ourselves about the unresolved shit getting in the way of what we claim to desire. like it or not. probably not.

venus in scorpio will reveal things about our relationship to pain, rage, & power. scorpio is the process of transforming our wounds through healing. effective action & strategy is birthed from this process. agency is birthed from this process. but the thing is, we can’t skip steps. with scorpio, it is a death-rebirth cycle. we must go from wound to rage to healing to action.

true rage can’t be pretended or performed. true rage shakes us to our core. true rage in itself is not the destroyer- the hurt that roots it is. true rage can be a change agent, a medicine, a catapult towards power if we are responsible with it. don’t conflate lies about powerlessness with rage. don’t conflate refusal to take responsibility for subscribing to those lies with rage.

when we attempt to heal without honoring rage, we spiritually bypass. when we attempt to act without tending to the wound, our energy is misdirected & we do more harm. when we attempt to rage without being accountable for our healing, our wound becomes toxic. when we are wounded but will not sit with rage so we can heal, we never act. so, it is our responsibility to transform.

transformation is when the phoenix bursts into flames, in the wisdom of knowing that it has become all it can be in this phase. everything must burn if it is to begin again, if it is to continue living. when the phoenix rebirths, it is not an entirely new entity. it still holds the life-force & experience of what it was before. to burn is compassion for the phoenix; a love it has for itself that makes it unwilling to tolerate being miserable or getting stuck in what can no longer feels like vitality.

venus retrograde is an invitation to be intentional with the space that your pain, your rage, and even your healing takes up. none of these are entities outside of yourself that you are powerless to; they directly impact your relationships & resources. you are capable of transformation & deep, deep love. this is where your resonance comes from, this is where your desires are met, this is where you begin to live again. this is love.


you can find venus retro horoscopes for each sign & ritual recommendations in the Commune.
you can work with me if you would like to get in-depth details of what this venus retro cycle might hold for you,

oxo
saltwater & stars