new moon & uranus in taurus

tuesday, may 15 @7:49AM EDT | 24 degrees

happy new moon in taurus!  

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uranus goes into taurus tonight.  

intentions are so important currently- not just so you have a harvest you can resonate with when the full moon in taurus comes late october, but so you can anchor the energy of this 7 year shift of uranus in aries to taurus. you don’t have to know them today, or ever. it may be enough to pay attention to how you feel & know how you want to feel. but if you have space, be with yourself & think about this time container of 6 months (new to full moon) & how the change-god uranus is on your side.  

I’ve been thinking about how intentions are different than goals. goals can be useful when they’re reframed by our agency, not determined by obligation. goals feel very pragmatic to me. intentions (especially when we’re working with the moon) feel more like space-making. like we’re creating room in our hearts & minds & life for what we want to show up. we’re shaping a container without necessarily being in control of the specificity of what fills it. like, we don’t really know what will come, how the container will change, what the contents will actually be at the end of a cycle. 

goals feel action oriented- we need to stay focused, accomplish things strategically, & be committed. intentions feel intuitive- we need to trust ourselves, know what we want, & be willing to be flexible with it. we navigate with intention. we arrive at goals. neither is better or worse, right or wrong. it seems like two different ways of moving that are both useful in appropriate contexts & with the nuance of understanding our relationship to the pressure within both. 

creating intentions at the new moon can often feel like pressure. we’re releasing what’s no longer necessary to hold onto, we’re opening ourselves up to something new or more. there is tension in this, stretching that must be done gently but firmly. an intention feels more like energy work & goals feel more like tangible/practical work  

I think it’s important that when working with a collective/outer planet like uranus, we’re remembering that we cannot embody this energy. it’s not your job to BECOME uranus, to change everything all at once, to know all the things. it’s your job to trust yourself, to be willing to evolve, & to move slowly enough to do so intentionally. 

keeping this in mind, what do you want to begin now? what way of being, relating, moving through the multiverse do you want to explore? what seeds do you want to plant, knowing that you’ll water & tend to them as needed? remember that you have agency to shape this transition  

be tender with the lessons of the past 7 years of uranus in aries. be tender with the hopes you have for the next 7, as unknowable as they are, as uranus travels through taurus & brings us new opportunities to experiment. uranus will reframe the taurus part of your chart. some of it may feel like it’s happening fast or already happening. don’t be surprised if you’re anxious. inhale & exhale. there is no room for fear here- connect to the abundance of the multiverse that has brought you to this moment & trust it will continue to support you.   

oxo

saltwater & stars

mermaid musings on money & receptivity

prelude: this is me sharing mermaid musings & thought experiments at the intersection of astrology, decolonization, anti-capitalism, & spirituality. I want to have this conversation so deeply but only if it is centered in an understanding of how capitalism takes from us all & how racism/white supremacy impact the access to resources people like me have. any conversation about the connection between our spiritual/energetic practice & money that isn't centered in an analysis of justice/history has the potential to be harmful because we cannot use spirituality to bypass systemic, institutional, & economic injustices. I. have. no. answers. nor all the questions. only experiments & observations. listening.

 

I was sitting in the sun yesterday in the company of a tree & from somewhere (I think it whispered it to me) I had an epiphany that there is a clear relationship between money & receptivity. the sun is in taurus so material resources are on the mind. I've emboldened the keywords in the definition below that are associated with venus, ruler of taurus. when we’re talking about a season (what sign the sun is in), we are ultimately talking about the expression of the planet that rules that sign. so during taurus season, we’re musing on venus.

definition of receptivity

1able or inclined to receive; especially open and responsive to ideas, impressions, or suggestions
2: a of a sensory end organ fit to receive and transmit stimuli
b sensory

 
something I've observed about taurus is that they absolutely will work their ass off for material security, but really they'd prefer to ease into it. this makes me think of our relationship with the earth, with nature, how we are nature. the sustenance the land is meant to give us is something meant to be cultivated, given attention to, & responded to intentionally. but never forced. it's a relationship of receptivity & response-ability. capitalism & money can try to destroy & replace this organic relationship but it is something we can actually return to, in different ways. not all of us have access to being in relationship with land/the earth in the way we might want to be- in that, I've found that changing my relationship to money has been the beginning of reclaiming a lot of the ease & trust that working with the earth cultivates. because money is the resource that provides food/water/shelter that I need & am attached to at this time. 

the relationship between money & receptivity I am seeing so clearly right now is that when you stop believing that we need to "pull ourselves up by our bootstraps" & just work hard, there needs to be something else to believe in. I've been experimenting with trusting that what I need will come. what that really means is that I center myself in believing that abundance is actually possible. then I open myself up to honoring that it may arrive in multiple known & unknown ways. I solidify my intention of being receptivity by stretching myself into being willing to ask for material support when I need it- and then allowing it in. this is energetic work that I can choose to support with spiritual/magical practice for amplification. it can be deep, painful work. when we talk about energy, we're often talking about the alignment of the mind, heart, & body.

there are so many internalized beliefs about scarcity, work ethic, and "earning our keep" that it's often hard to imagine another way. it's often hard to imagine being supported by the multiverse, by our community, by the truth that we don't need to earn access to basic human rights. and there are certainly times when we need to participate in the system more than other others because survival is an instinct that is useful when we're put in the position to have to rely on it. only you can decide when a more energetically receptive route to getting needs met or being supported is appropriate. I am not saying that we all need to stop working our capitalistic jobs & just trust. I am saying that I am experiencing what happens when I make the energetic & spiritual investment into receptivity & ask for what I need-whether from others or the multiverse. this is the essence of venus-and an element of emergent strategy- decentralization/interdependence. 

I'm a cash poor 2nd generation boricua. these systems we're supposed to rely on for material security (in the context of the USA) were never meant for me or mine. they're not supposed to work. and neither are they aligned with what I believe. so until it all comes crashing down & we ingeniously survive it, I'm going to practice trusting in other realms rooted in the power I know is available to me while doing what I need to do to be secure. I want to be receptive to the support of the unseen forces that conspire with me towards healing, liberation, & abundance. and ultimately, be receptive to the constant circulation of resources that happens among those who are interested in finding alternative ways of being in this world, in relationship with money, & in love with each other. 

oxo
saltwater & stars

translucent: full moon in scorpio

Sunday, april 29 @8:58 PM EDT | 9 degrees

    (from latest post on instagram. you can find me @saltwater.stars. 

  (from latest post on instagram. you can find me @saltwater.stars. 

CW: this is going to be a more personal post with references to family trauma & parental dysfunction. I am a scorpio with multiple planets in the sign packed into my 4th house. with a full moon here, I can only get real right now. this is a vulnerable moment for me- thanks scorpio full moon! only because it feels tender & raw. not because I don’t want yous to know I been through some fucked up shit. I know many astrologers try to separate their work from their stories but one of the ways I’ve learned astrology most deeply is by reading those who have woven it into their lives. I hope you can find comfort & resonance within this, as well. 

 the message of figures looking to the left indicating the past, forward indicating the present, & to the right indicating the future has been coming up around me lately. I realized this is actually very relevant to the full moon in scorpio, it being a water sign in-between two others. it occurred to me that this trinity of direction could be correlated to the water signs. cancer looks to the past, to the left, to lineage & ancestors. scorpio looks to the present, to transforming pain carried over into power for everyone surrounding them. pisces, the final water sign, the final sign, looks to the future- how it ties into the past & the present in synchronistic & unseen ways. 

 the 4th house traditionally belongs to cancer. it holds themes of home, family, the past, ancestors, & emotional/spiritual lineage. this full moon has me thinking about my relationship to these things, particularly the parts that cannot be transformed. because individuals cannot embody what is supposed to be communal work. and it doesn’t matter how much I shift my perspective or drop into compassion, it doesn’t change how dangerous & harmful some people we’re born belonging to can be. there is individual healing work which also means there is often simultaneous boundary work necessary to create the conditions needed for there to be a release from pain & reclamation of power. 

I am grateful for the spirituality I was able to salvage from religion, even as I abandon the spiritual bypassing it colonized & gaslit me with. but I’m not about to use my experience to frame anyone else’s. I’m inherently very careful when talking about abuse, personal power, and healing because I know what it is to be gaslit by conversations on these things. I know what it is to be told to be compassionate when you should be angry & to then begin believing it. compassion is a practice that must benefit the impacted, those whose power has been stripped by situation & dysfunctional dynamics. not position them for more harm to be done. I know what it is to not be at the place where this conversation of healing is constructive. If you are there, I see you. 

 recently I had to end a relationship with a toxic relative for the second time. one of my parental figures. I knew this is what needed to be done for me to be free enough to transmute pain into power. so that future generations would not carry this weight of bargaining to be loved by someone who claims they do but doesn’t embody it. as I witnessed the grief of this, it was as if it was happening in another realm of my experience. just an echo of a deeper grief, a deeper pain I hold from having to extricate another parental figure 2 years ago. one who raised me. 

 the reclamation in this is that for the first time, I was able to give myself compassion. all the overextending I was doing to center compassion for the other individual was now available to me. and instead of grieving the trauma that inhibited either of them from being able to be in healthy relationship with me as I have been doing for 20 years, I was able to grieve the innocence I forfeited in being a child who has to make the decision to put relationships with parental figures to death. I may never recover that innocence- there’s an awareness of the depth of trauma that is possible that you can’t unsee. and I don’t think I want to unsee it. because within that has been my portal to change & transformation, my commitment to love & healing, my centering of compassion. 

 the real time nonlinear process of this is that my hope is also forever impacted. it takes more focus & intentionality to cultivate it, to stay curious. because I know how dangerous it is to not be able to see clearly enough to know that what you’re hoping for will actually harm you. it’s a risk of being human that we can’t forfeit, sometimes. this makes it easy to question myself, hard as fuck to trust others, & opens up this whole grey area of the unknown.  

translucent: permitting light to pass through but diffusing it so that persons, objects, etc., on the opposite side are not clearly visible.  

 

that’s where I spend most of my time. stretching. this stretching is so translucent. so clear and bright and weird. I have to be in the act of creating new possibilities while also being ready to navigate unexpected consequences. stretching into trust with myself. stretching into space to trust others too. stretching to trust love. to recover hope. to practice innocence. exploring this space without inserting or attaching my needs for validation or approval. explore it free from my pain or giving away my power. and therefore explore it spiritually. slowing down enough to notice where the self-manipulation, the fear, & insecurity come in. 

 because healing is death work. healing is cycling through layers & layers of shit you knew & didn’t know was there. this death & grief work must be done though, to access joy. I’m not saying we must be in pain or go through trauma to feel joy. but that if we have been through it, this work may be a way out. I want to engage with the power of scorpio because I want to flow into the future of pisces. I want to believe that unconditional love, interconnectedness, & safe, sacred imagining is possible. 

and then I want to help you stay believing in it, too. may your full moon experience be bright, deep, & transformative in ways that bring you joy & power  

oxo

saltwater & stars